I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
