Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Randomize