I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
