I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
