My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
