She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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