if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
