What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
