How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
