fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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