READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize