I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
