So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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