Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
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