I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize