Having a random hookup so left but love u
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
