i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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