Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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