I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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