so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
