i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
