I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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