Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
