Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
You're a waste of cheezeits
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
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