I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I AM VODKA MAN
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Randomize