butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize
