Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize