I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
