Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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