Having a random hookup so left but love u
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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