There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
even my farts smell like vagina
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
True strength comes from lack of pants
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
