A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Randomize
