Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
