I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
