I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
