she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Randomize
