Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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