Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Randomize
