Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
