He disabled his match.com account in front of me
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
