? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
