sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize
