I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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