I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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