your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize
