what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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