i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
it's like heaven, but drunker
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize