happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
