Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Bring me that man meat
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
