No awkward lesbian experiences without me
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
